Top 10 things NOT to ask FBI while taking a tour

10. Since you did a background check on me, does that mean I'm going
to Guantanamo Bay at the end of the tour for the rest of my life?

9. Where's the room where you torture brown people who don't speak
English?

8. The C.I.A.: Friend or Foe?

7. What's your favorite round for knocking off hippies marching at
a peace protest, .45 cal, 9 mil, or 5.56?

6. In the scene from the movie "Die Hard," where Dwayne
the L.A. cop says "We're gonna need some more FBI guys I guess" -- was
that cool or what?

5. Does Will Smith monitor extraterrestrials from this office?

4. Will I be waterboarded for posting this?

3. That whole 4th Amendment, no searches without a warrant stuff,
does that mean the Founding Fathers were commies, pinkos, liberals or
terrorists?

2. Where in Tampa did J. Edgar Hoover shop for his dresses?

And, ....

1. Does Dick Cheney wear the same dress size as J. Edgar Hoover?